Quantum

While in Batangas for an R&R, I overheard my colleagues talking about an avid atheist who turned to God and even converted his kids into the faith. As an existentialist who have long abandoned the belief in the bearded one, I was all ears.

Finding myself on a one-on-one with the a learned member of the group, I was told it can be explained by quantum. Hmmm....what the heck is quantum? I wasn't exactly given a definition but it involved everyone being part of a bigger whole...the environment, the world we live in, and to a large extent, the universe as we know it. On an atomic level, we're all the same...gas and atoms. Okay...I was still on the same page but I was anxious how that leads to a God. She continued that what we do invariably affects the bigger whole because we are part and parcel to it. Others then consider that collective whole...hold on to your seats...GOD. What about the bearded one? Well, I was told that they choose to personify this collective whole by calling it God.

I don't know how to deal with it. It seemed like a word play. Since I believe in a collective whole, and the collective whole is personified by quantum subcribers as God, does it mean now that God exists?

The Believers
On the other hand, after realizing there is no bearded one, I've always envied the church-going believers. They still benefit from the placebo effect of a power greater than theirs...of completely surrendering themselves to it when all seems lost. I think this sense of surrender unleashes the power within to make things happen their way. Even if it doesn't, it's still good for their psychological well-being to think there is a god who will be there for them through thick and thin.

I, on the other hand, have to endure the trials of life without the psychological buffer...much like weathering a storm without shelter. The feeling of isolation and being on my own could not be underscored further. That was how it was for the most part of my adult life...until Banaue.

Crashing in Banaue
In my recent trip up north, something happened in Banaue that shifted my thinking. After crashing hard while doing a 40-minute downhill run, I was left hurting and unable to ride. I knew I had to spend a good deal of time in bed recuperating. That was unacceptable. I wanted my mobility back. I wanted to continue riding and explore the interior of Banaue with whatever limited time I had left. I had to heal fast...very fast. I knew I didn't have it in me to will such an outcome. Neither can I pray. To whom? It would be like making a wish list for Santa come Christmas day.

Epiphany in Banaue
I've always thought of myself as part of a bigger collective but somehow chose to keep to myself, unmindful of the powers at play within this whole...simply put, I didn't care. I cherished the control I had on my destiny and make things happen myself...until now. I was helpless. I was bruised all over with no chance of being back on the saddle soon. Only then did I begin to think of the vast energy within this collective whole - the power of a volcanic eruption, the devastation a lashing hurricane can inflict, the earth-splitting process of an earthquake, etc. I am part of this collective whole, therefore, I should be able to tap into its energy to heal my injuries. By surrendering and letting go, I felt access to powers bigger than mine. I simply had to harness all that collective energy into a funnel and get me healed fast. There was my surrender...and in the process, unleashing the power within...and without.

Summation
Did it work? Well, I didn't get up the next day to do another downhill run, but I think I recuperated pretty quickly. More importantly, I learned to tap into powers and energy much greater than mine in complete surrender...as though there was a god. Call it a crutch, but when you're limping, it comes in handy.

--- TheLoneRider

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